I want to love my body and myself as much as my husband does. That’s right. I said it. Let me be really honest with you for a few moments…
This morning I stood in the mirror beating myself up for the 10 lbs of newlywed weight I gained. (I partially blame hubby for taking me out on so many dates – love you honey!)
After a flood of negative thoughts rushed through my mind, without knowing, hubby found me in the closet getting ready for the day, wrapped his arms around me, and started telling me how beautiful I was as he kissed my makeup less face and ran his hands through my hair that at that point resembled a birds nest. He does this every morning without fail. I don’t even think he realizes he does it. He does it because he loves me. But it got me thinking, what if I loved my body and myself as much as he does?
What if I wasn’t focused on being thin, but focused on giving my body what it needed – whether it be rest, a bubble bath, a good meal, or simply just grace after eating that slice of chocolate cake. What if I 100% accepted and even loved all of my imperfections? Somehow my husband can, but why can’t I? Now, I personally have pretty good self-acceptance, but something stops me when I see my scars from numerous surgeries or my stretch marks on my legs. Yet, somehow, my husband actually LOVES them.
One time… actually, no. MANY times I asked him how he could love something like stretch marks or scars. He simply answered “because it’s you”. He continued on to talk about how every stretch mark and scar makes me who I am today. (This was also one of the many moments when I knew this was the man I was going to marry!)
Those scars I have, they remind me of the pain I felt from those surgeries. But, they also remind me that it is because of those surgeries that I can run, jump, and dance my way through a wonderful life. It’s really all how you look at it. Sure, I’m reminded that it was a painful experience, but I’ve chosen not to dwell on it. Instead, I dwell on the outcome of those surgeries.
Today, in an effort to change my perception of myself, I self loved a bit. I wore an outfit that made me feel beautiful. I bought myself Starbucks at 3pm in the afternoon just cuz. I took 30 minutes out of my day to work out. I’m paying attention to what my body needs throughout the day. And now… I’m getting a glimpse of what my husband sees…AND I’m loving it. I think I may try this everyday.